Coastal Health Systems of Brevard, Inc.


EMS Humor - Part Deuce There are only 10 things in this world you need to fix any ambulance, any place, any time...
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1. Duct Tape: Not just a tool, a veritable Swiss Army Knife in stickum and plastic. It's safety wire, body material, radiator hose, upholstery, insulation and more - in an easy-to-carry package. Sure, there's prejudice surrounding duct tape in concours competitions, but in the real world, everything from LeMans-winning Porsches to $1 million motorcoaches use it by the yard. The only thing that can get you out of more scrapes is thirty-five cents and a phone booth.
2. Vice Grips: Equally adept as well as a wrench, hammer, pliers, baling wire, twister, breaker-off-of-frozen-bolts and wiggle-it-till-it-falls-off tool. The heavy artillary of your tool box, Vice Grips are the only tool designed expressly to fix things screwed up beyond repair.
3. Spray Lubrications: A considerably cheaper alternative to new doors, alternators and other squeaky items. Slicker than pig phlegm, repeated soaking will allow the main hull bolts of the Andrea Doria to be removed by hand. Strangely enough, an integral part of these sprays is the infamous Little Red Tube that flies out of the nozzle if you look at it cross-eyed (one of the worst tools of all time).
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